His tales were fantasy fodder for some, he knew, which secretly pleased him. If all went according to plan — and why shouldn’t it? — tonight’s dispatch would not disappoint. The evening would begin with a succulent dinner of pork tenderloin in a rosemary-ginger marinade, tiny spears of young asparagus and roasted new potatoes, with raspberry sorbet for dessert. Nothing too heavy, as neither he nor Peggy should feel overly full, not with the activities that awaited them. After the meal was consumed, the day’s events discussed, the dishes done, and the children tucked into bed…the delicate dance would commence. First he’d instruct Peggy to prepare for the session. She would meticulously shower, shave and apply his favorite lotion, and greet him wearing the emerald green bra and boy shorts he had selected for her at the lingerie specialty shop during their last visit to Vancouver. Sam loved that set, especially since he had cleverly modified the bra by making a small crosscut in the. All, of course, hypothetical. It was all in my head, only nervousness brought on by leaving my position of lax and comfortability, by wandering out past my front door. I had become a home-body, dull and humdrum, and the outside world is a scary place. I was there though, at the gas station, drumming my fingers on the steering wheel, trying to decide what to do. What to do. I was in the parking lot already. I felt like a fool. I knew no one was paying any attention to me, no one cared. They didn’t know what I was doing, why I was sitting in my car all sweaty and shaking. But I knew. I knew what a numbskull imbecile I was being. And I knew that it was written all over my face. A fool who knows he is a fool cannot hide his act, it’s like a giant marquee was put on a moving truck and was following him all around town with its flashing lights and giant letters. I had to calm myself down, regain my cool and composure, even if it was just in my eyes. I scooped the change from my pockets,.
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