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She sniffed, swallowed and wrote, "Dearest Billy" and then stopped, balled up the sheet of well-laid paper and threw it across the room. The cat on her bed lifted one ear and opened one eye. She dipped her pen again, wiped the tip carefully and wrote, "Sir," and then she stopped, bit her lip, took a deep breath and crushed that sheet in her fist and tossed it over her shoulder. She blotted her third try and dropped that to the floor. On the next attempt she wrote: "Private Fields - I received your fine letter which came through Head of Elk, by way of Mr. Paca's rider, and was sorry to learn that you were not well. I hope this note finds you, and your misguided companions, in better health." She stopped, read over what she had penned, squirmed in her chair and drew a large X several times across the page, tore it in half and tossed the pieces away. "Damn," she said aloud and beat her feet on the floor. "Damn, damn!" The cat hissed and scurried away.She stomped down the wide staircase. Probably his boss had been on his case about something and he was taking it out on me."After that, all of a sudden it's Squirrel. Can you believe that? 'Squirrel this,' and 'Squirrel that.' 'Hey, man, I got me some SQUIRREL this weekend.'" Shaking his head. "If you got a look up a chick's mini-skirt it was called a 'squirrel shot.'"Of course for the longest time it's been Pussy. Now that I think about it, Pussy was always kind of mixed in with the others."Who thinks up all these fucking animals anyway?" He was talking around the fat cigar in his mouth, lighting it and puffing.Our building is a no-smoking area, but he says his office is his and anybody who wants to argue about it can shove an 8-inch shade-grown long-leaf Dominican up their ass.I've worked for this moron for seven years. I'm the top-selling author for Red Velvet Publications, Adult Fiction in Paperback, 12325 Golden Blvd, just next door to the Pink Pussycat Gentlemen's Club.My mother doesn't know I write dirty books.
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