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The girl had tied the wagon to her dog’s collar and to the cat’s testicles.‘Little partner, ‘ the fire-fighter said, ‘I don’t want to tell you how to run your rig, but if you were to tie that rope around the cat’s collar, I think you could go faster.’The little girl replied thoughtfully, ‘You’re probably right, but then I wouldn’t have a siren.’In a transatlantic flight, a plane passes through a severe storm. The turbulence is awful, and things go from bad to worse when one wing is struck by lightning.One woman in particular loses it. Screaming, she stands up in the front of the plane. “I’m too young to die!” she wails. Then she yells, “Well, if I’m going to die, I want my last minutes on Earth to be memorable! I’ve had plenty of sex in my life, but no one has ever made me really feel like a woman! Well, I’ve had it! Is there ANYONE on this plane who can make me feel like a WOMAN?!?”For a moment there is silence. Everyone has forgotten their own peril, and they all stare, riveted, at. ‘Any plans for tonight, Sport?’ his father asked. Even though both parents worked, it was important to them that they spent at least one meal a day with their children, this at a time before the phrase ‘quality time’ was even invented. ‘Yeah, work,’ Chad, mumbled through a mouthful of food. ‘So, you won’t be home for dinner tonight?’ his mother asked. ”Fraud not,’ Chad said and scraped the last of the syrup. ‘Leave the pattern on that plate,’ his father said. ‘After work, we’ll probably be going bowling,’ Chad said. ‘I want to go,’ Lacey said as she bounded into the dining room. ‘What about Dale?’ Chad asked. ‘He hates bowling, doesn’t he?’ Hmph, Dale,’ Lacey said dismissively and dug into her own plate of pancakes. ‘You two still not talking?’ her mother asked. Secretly Mr. And Mrs. Fontenot were delighted, they felt that the twenty three year old Dale was a little too old for their daughter. But neither of them wanted to interfere overmuch. The experts said that it was best to let.
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