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It was also one of the businesses where I could hire some of the people my organizations ‘rescued’ when they needed to readapt to the outside world. I took a small sip of the surprisingly well-tasting non-alcohol wine I always got when we met up at the bar and happily watched my friends as they talked about their men’s appreciation of the underwear they had bought. I wondered how long it would take before Susan noticed the ring on Sarah’s finger. The way Sarah was waving it around as she described the perfect, blue lace set that had made John go absolutely crazy, it seemed blue was his favorite color, I didn’t think it would take too long. ‘Whaaat is thaaaat?’ Susan interrupted Sarah’s happy description of manly adoration ‘On your finger? Oh my god, is that for real?’ ‘Yes,’ Sarah squealed ‘John took me to dinner this Saturday evening and before they brought the dessert he got down on his knee and asked me to marry him, and to please give him an answer before my chocolate soufflé. It you think you had gridlock before, if you think the Christmas shopping crowds were huge at Macy’s, give it another 90 years. Fortunately for all of us reading this story, we’ll all be dead. Yet, according to Shirley MacLaine, our souls survive, our souls never die. ‘Hmm, I wonder what my soul wants for Christmas. A new Ferrari? A Bentley? Nah, perhaps something that’s even better than that for the soul. I know, Ben and Jerry’s Cherry Garcia ice cream. Now, that’s the ticket, that’s real soul food. The good thing about being dead and just being a soul is that I can eat as much ice cream as I want and not gain any weight, I think. I just hope that my soul has a mouth and a hand to hold the ice cream spoon.’ Forget about humans for a minute, let’s start with some animals facts. Did you know that Penguins live only in the Southern Hemisphere and not in the Northern Hemisphere. Weird. I wonder why that is. ‘Maybe they’re Rebel penguins. Get it? The south? Oh, never mind.’ Because.
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