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Eager though I was, I made myself go down to breakfast and then wait a while longer. Early mornings, I knew, were prime time for hunters; they'd be thick on the ground, and they wouldn't thank me for scaring off the deer.On the way back up to the room I stopped briefly to double-check with the desk clerk—another of the teen-age clones who seemed always on duty there—about one of the hunting areas on the map I'd picked up earlier, mentioning that I planned to go hiking there and asking were there any precautions I should take. Bright colors, she said, preferably orange. When I told her the only jacket I had with me was dark brown she popped into the back room and emerged with an orange vest; the lodge, she said, kept a few on hand "just in case."I thanked her and took it gratefully. It would be ironic indeed to have escaped Walter and Cesar Romero both and then get shot down by some myopic weekend warrior too dim-witted to notice that his target had two legs instead of four and lacked. ”“What did you do?”“We rubbed each other off, that’s all. [In a Valley Girl intonation:] ‘Slumber parties are fun.’ Especially with the sort of white girls I grew up around. Very wild, my parents would say. Very fun, I’d say. Ain’t middle class life wonderful?” We laughed. “And you?”“Once, in Europe one summer. Same as you, just jerking each other off.”“So I guess we do know we’re straight.”“No, we know we’re bi.”She laughed, “Okay, granted, but all I want is you.”“Same here.” After a week, she said, “Party tomorrow night with my four closest girlfriends. I hope you’re ready for it. They were eager to get to know you.”“What should I wear?”“An asbestos-lined suit with special armor for your privates. I suppose I should help you out, but really, you’ll be on your own. I’m gonna watch, see if you’re as good a match as you pretend to be. Got my favorite popcorn all picked out.”“Damn, that’s cold.”“You’ll need something cold to soothe the burns after they get through with you.”We laughed.
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