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He’d never felt so free. He arrived too early at the restaurant. He knew he would appear desperate. He wanted to appear punctual. He would always choose the appearance of desperation over being late. An important point occurred to him. She’d asked for several pictures of him in in varied stages of undress. As her power over him increased she demanded photos of him in lewd and compromising situations. He’d never even seen her face. She might already be here looking at him and he wouldn’t have the slightest idea. He opened the car door and started towards the entrance of the restaurant. As he approached he noticed a very good looking couple walking in as well. The lady was stunning. She wore a black dress that wrapped her body like a second skin. The neckline was nearly to her navel and did little to hide her ample breasts. Her hair was a deep red and piled high on her head. As he took in her shoes he had to catch his breath. They weren’t especially high, it was the black buckle around. And quickly. It’s rare. You cannot find it any other time of year but now. So drink up! Who cares that it has 10,000 calories in every sip? It’s not as if you’re going to turn into an eggnog-alcoholic or something. It’s a treat. Enjoy it. Have one for me. Have two. It’s later than you think. It’s Christmas!o If something comes with gravy, use it. That’s the whole point of gravy. Gravy does not stand alone. Pour it on. Make a volcano out of your mashed potatoes. Fill it with gravy. Eat the volcano. Repeat.o As for mashed potatoes, always ask if they’re made with skim milk or whole milk. If it’s skim, pass. Why bother? It’s like buying a sports car with an automatic transmission.o Do not have a snack before going to a party in an effort to control your eating. The whole point of going to a Christmas party is to eat other people’s food for free. Lots of it.o Under no circumstances should you exercise between now and New Year’s. You can do that in January when you have nothing else to.
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