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"So Pastor Jones, slightly put out, took the bird home and at first it was a great novelty ... BUT: it turned out the bird's previous owner was a sailor on a tramp freighter and he had taught the bird to speak with his own tendency to foul (no NOT fowl you idiots) language ... after three or four very embarrassing incidents... (Including one where a young mother who was breast-feeding her daughter was encouraged to "Show us ya tits, Sweetie." ) Pastor Jones decided he was going to have to get rid of the bird. This was not an easy decision to make because he had grown fond of the galah.Discussing his problem with one of his church elders, the elder said; "how about we try something. I have a parrot that talks but all it does all day is sit on its perch and intone 'Let us pray!' Perhaps the good influence will rub off on your galah if we bring them together?"Anything was worth a try and so, although Pastor Jones was doubtful he agreed and the next day Elder Pirot brought his parrot. My hazel eyes were now a bright emerald. As I look further down I noticed that I had toned muscles. I was always wiry. But now I had some bulk. What is going... "Calder, are you up? You'll be late for school." "Damn," I mumbled as I quickly showered and brushed my teeth. As I was heading out the door I shouted, "bye, see ya." Once I ran down the paved stairs, i hit the gravel, running to the bus stop 30 yards away. As I hit the turn ten yards in, I could see the school bus flashing it's red lights as it stopped. I knew I has not going to make it, and my suspicions were correct when I saw the stop sign starting to fold close. I blinked my eyes closed and imagined standing at the bus door. Then opened them and what the, I was standing at the door, and the bus driver was giving me that, "you are making me late and are the bane of my existence, get on or die," look. When I got on the bus, Al, the bus driver, closed the door, and drove to the next stop. As I.
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