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I stood there for a moment, then turned and made a beeline straight to the front door. I opened the door and headed straight towards my car.Lo and behold, my entire future family was standing outside all clapping!With tears in his eyes, my father-in-law hugged me and said, "We are very happy that you have passed our little test. We couldn't ask for better man for our daughter. Welcome to the family!"So the moral of this story is: Always keep your condoms in your car.Tarzan & Jane are swinging through the trees one day, with Tarzan repeatedly making his jungle call.Suddenly he lets out an almighty ear-splitting shriek.He turns to Jane and says "Jane, if I've told you once, I've told you a thousand times ... GRAB! THE! VINE!!!"-- and two that go togetherQ: Why do elephants paint their balls red?A: So they can hide in apple trees.Q: How did Tarzan die?A: Picking apples.Building PermitSome have asked what I've been doing in retirement. Well, I applied for a building permit for a new. She sucked ever so gently as she played with my penis, toying with me; rapid, random touches of her fingers exciting me as she flicked my cock with her hands. I spent an eternity as she played with my manhood until once again my pecker protruded before me with no support.I opened my eyes and saw her skirt drop to the floor, then she climbed aboard the chair and settled herself over my throbbing member. She had hardly started to move when the phone rang. I cursed mightily but blindly searched for the headset and settled it over my ear. With a great effort I managed to answer the phone without heavy breathing reminiscent of an obscene phone call. While I talked she was slowly squirming around on my lap, working my frustrated pecker just enough to keep me hard. At that moment I hated all mothers of small, sick children, for not only did I have to listen to her I had to track down the doctor as well.It was a delicious frustration, though, with Carol gently riding my pecker for a good 10.
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