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“What did you put in the paper?” his wife asks.“Here boy!” he replies...A blond man is in jail ... Guard looks in his cell and sees him hanging by his feet.“Just WHAT are you doing?” he asks.“Hanging myself,” the blond replies.“It should be around your neck” says the guard.“I tried that,” he replies, “but then I couldn’t breathe”.( This one actually makes sense ... well, sort of... )An Italian tourist asks a blond man: “Why do Scuba divers always fall backwards off their boats?”To which the blond man replies: “If they fell forward, they’d still be in the boat.”A guy is walking along Whyte Avenue when he comes across a lamp partially buried in a garbage can.He picks up the lamp and gives it a rub.A genie appears and tells him he has been granted one wish.The guy thinks for a moment and says, “I want to live forever.”“Sorry,” said the genie, “I’m not allowed to grant eternal life.”“OK, then, I want to die after the Liberals balance the budget and eliminate the debt.”“You crafty little. I'm going to fill your pussy with cum." shewhispered in my ear and I squealed as my pussy exploded in ecstacy.Exactly as I usually did when I fucked her, she brought her mouth tomine and shoved her tongue inside to complete our bond of intimacy andpassion. I sucked on it as the cock in me pumped and pumped more than ithad ever pumped before. In my fantasy she was fucking me and filling mewith hot cum. When she finally climbed off me she whispered again in my ear with aknowing smile, "I know your secret dearest husband."Later, after I'd calmed down, I realized that I'd revealed a secret flawin my psyche to her that I may be a closet submissive. My wife had goneinto the bathroom to clean my cum out of her and I just lay there on myback thinking about what we'd just done. Was this the start of somethingnew in our sex lives? I'd had the strongest orgasm I'd ever had and Iknew I would want to do it again and I was scared.++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++I guess I should tell you about.
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