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If you don’t believe in oral sex... ... keep your mouth shut.Fixing the dentsOne day a Stepford Wife entered an auto body shop claiming that she’d suffered extensive damage to her new car.The mechanic thought he’d have some fun with her so he told her that she didn’t need him to fixed all the dents.He said she could fix them herself by blowing into the tailpipe as hard as she could and they’d all pop out.The Stepford Wives went home and proceeded to get down on her hands and knees in the driveway. She was blowing into the pipe as hard as she could and her face was turning purple when The Stepford Wife from across the street walked over and asked what she was doing?After hearing the whole story the second Stepford Wife pauses for a moment then responds, “Hello! The windows are down!”The Church GossipMildred, the church gossip, and self-appointed monitor of the church’s morals, kept sticking her nose into other people’s business.Several members did not approve of her extra-curricular. The kids for miles around celebrated.Snow usually didn't fall in the area of my new home, until January sometime. It just wasn't Christmas without a nice snow, though, if you asked me.We received our TV signal via a satellite hook-up, and only had to put up with interrupted reception during severe storms. This was not a problem, as the entertainment center was well stocked with movies and shows from all over the world. Plus, there was the home computer. It was programmed and wired into the house's security system, and also served as our high-speed internet connection. We had a double link to the internet: satellite, and wireless. Our phone service was via prepaid cell phones.I didn't want my home dependent on any outside utility, whatsoever. Water, sewer, trash... everything was provided, or done, by installations on my property. I was set!"God, this place is just perfect," Brenda said. We were gazing out the widow of the living room, at the fresh snow outside."I'm glad you like it..
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