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- Jimmy DuranteI have never hated a man enough to give his diamonds back.- Zsa Zsa GaborOnly Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar and fat.- Alex LevineMy luck is so bad that if I bought a cemetery, people would stop dying.- Rodney DangerfieldMoney can't buy you happiness ... But it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery.- Spike MilliganUntil I was thirteen, I thought my name was SHUT UP.- Joe NamathI don't feel old. I don't feel anything until noon. Then it's time for my nap.- Bob HopeI never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it...- W. C. FieldsWe could certainly slow the aging process down if it had to work its way through Congress.- Will RogersDon't worry about avoiding temptation. As you grow older, it will avoid you.- Winston ChurchillMaybe it's true that life begins at fifty ... But everything else starts to wear out, fall out, or spread out...- Phyllis DillerBy the time a man is wise. “Why do you need my name?” “First time is it love? It’s just procedure. Filling in the forms.” I laughed. “What is it you think I’ve done?” The desk sergeant looked me up and down. With my hands cuffed behind my back, Mick’s trench coat was hanging open, revealing my night’s carefully-chosen attire. “Soliciting: to loiter or solicit in a street or public place for the purpose of prostitution.” As the words were read out, I looked up from the four-inch spikes of my heels, to my fishnet-clad legs, over my tiny black skirt and across the escaping flesh of my cleavage. Oh right. Why wouldn’t he think I was a prostitute? I went scarlet and quickly scanned the line of faces in the little waiting room behind me. Thankfully, I didn’t know any of them and besides a leery teenage boy ogling my body, no-one was paying me any attention. I decided that it’d be in my best interests to do as I was told and not kick-up a fuss; to rely on Mick to come good. I thought about giving a false name.
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