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She produced a broad patent black leather belt about 4" in width. Ithad double buckle holes and she placed this around my waist, the ladiesway, and tightly fastened the buckles. "This will look better once yourwaist is smaller," she said. I noted that the belt offered a furtherfastening via a row of central holes and a small stud. She worked thestud behind the belt and it poked through. She got out a small goldcoloured padlock and pressed it shut. She showed me a chain around herneck with a small key on it. "I think it best that your mistress keepsthis, don't you?" It had the corset belt and waist belt keys on it."Now the final touch." She got me to sit on the bed and slipped my feetinto a pair of mules. They were patent black strappy affairs with about5 inch heel and a 1" platform. They gripped my feet quite firmly and Inoticed that my red toe nails where evident poking through the peepholes under their sheer black nylon stockings. The buckles also alloweda small padlock. 'The priest thought long and hard and then said,'Squeeze seven lemons into a glass and then drink the juice.'The young woman asked, 'Will this cleanse me of my sins?The priest said, 'No, but it will wipe that smile off of your face.'This one is compliments of RrroscoA salesman drove into a small town where a circus was in progress. A sign read: "Don't miss Jock TheAmazing Scotsman".The salesman bought a ticket and sat down.There, on centre stage, was a table with three walnuts on it. Standing next to it was an old Scotsman.Suddenly the old man lifted his kilt, whipped out a huge willy and smashed all three walnuts with three mighty swings!The crowd erupted in applause as the elderly Scot was carried off on the shoulders of the crowd.Ten years later the salesman visited the same little town and saw a new poster for the same circus and the same sign:"Don't miss Jock The Amazing Scotsman" He couldn't believe the old guy was still alive, much less still doing his act!He bought a ticket..
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