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I sat with my tea and a note pad and wrote down everything. Writing things down had been therapeutic all through my confused adolescence. I used to write about being different from other girls at school; about the way a woman made me feel when I looked at her; how Miss Burnett had actually made me wet when, innocently, she had stood beside me as I read an essay out loud and her hand had rested on my shoulder. I still have those notebooks and reading them often makes me shudder at the naivety of the scribbled musings.I started with the conjuring tricks, the silk hankie, the full glass, the locket. Then the dreams. I didn’t, couldn’t write the detail. If anyone saw that, they’d be seeing deep into my depravity. I just wrote, ‘the dreams, the white dress.’ But I wrote, pages of notes that I would read again and again until I knew what was happening to me.I went to work, determined to search for a therapist, maybe a hypnotherapist, anyone who could help me. But then, during my coffee. He laughed hard at that, regaining control after a minute or so. I was going to say thank you. You were wonderful. Just wonderful? I said, raising my eyebrows and trying to hold back a grin. Then I became more serious. David, I want you to know that what we did today was the most sensual, ultimate erotic experience of my entire life. I will never forget it. Thank you!He kissed me then a soft kiss, but full of meaning and it made my heart soar. Qasim, I think I………………. Umm, I mean, I … thank you too, handsome. I was sure he was going to say something else, but changed his mind at the last minute. We kissed again as he smiled and bucked over me. We were both literally spent after three such powerful and potent orgasms and could have slept overnight like logs but I was extremely impressed when David asked me, honey, if you must leave, I better drop you now before I get totally disabled or better yet; it would be splendid if you stayed for the night. I contemplated for a moment knowing.
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