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As he sat sipping his coffee, a young woman sat down next to him. She turned to the pilot and asked, “Are you a real pilot?”He replied, ‘Well, I’ve spent my whole life flying planes, first Stearmans, then the early Grummans ... flew a Wildcat and Corsair in WWII, and later in the Korean conflict, Banshees and Cougars. I’ve taught more than 260 people to fly and given rides to hundreds, so I guess I am a pilot, and you, what are you?”She said, “I’m a lesbian. I spend my whole day thinking about naked women. As soon as I get up in the morning, I think about naked women. When I shower, I think about naked women. When I watch TV, I think about naked women. It seems everything makes me think of naked women.”The two sat sipping in silence. A little while later, a young man sat down on the other side of the old pilot and asked: “Are you a real pilot?”He replied, “I always thought I was, but I just found out I’m a lesbian.”Forwarded compliments of John A. By Jeff Foxworthy:If plastic water. " That's what Shae said," Emily smiled. "She told us how to get to the viewing site. We'll be back in an hour."As it turned out, everyone went but Eve and John, who stayed with Dave. When Shae got back from turning in the keys, John wordlessly got in the minivan and drove off; again, Dave figured what it was all about.Everyone was back within the hour, acting pretty subdued; though the scene had to have changed since Dave had seen it; it was still pretty shocking and sobering. Emily got out her cell phone, and after a few minutes reported the truck wasn't far out.Dave was still expecting something like a U-Haul; he was in no way prepared to see a large semi pull into the lot, the tool-belted beaver logo of General Hardware Retailers on the side. On the door of the huge Kenworth tractor was lettered, Sallows Brothers Trucking, Bradford, Michigan.Dave just shook his head. "Emily, I said you don't do things halfway, and this proves it." No big deal," she said, "Dean knew he was going to.
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