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I know she was different, I just could not figure out way. She finally told me she was a lesbian. OK, I cool with that. We stated hanging out and one she says let’s go to my bar. OK, I’m a GI, I like to drink. The bar was the only gay bar in a redneck town. I was a little freaked. But the night wore on, I became more at ease with BJ’s friends. One in particular, Samantha.Samantha was a beautiful redhead and was in her mid 30’s. We got on well, I got liquored up and Samantha offered me a ride home. Bj said be careful but I thought, “what could happen”?. Sam took me to her house. We talked, drank some more and Samantha kissed me. A deep “ we are getting ready to get busy” kiss. I felt her cock press against my thigh. I back away and said I don’t do that and she said I did not have to do anything. In the back of my mind I wanted to see the cum shoot out of her cock but I was “gay”. I had a raging hard on, but I wasn’t gay, I kept saying to myself. Samantha turned out the lights and . He said he would only want me when I was ready to love him. I was greatly surprised by his restraint and I asked him, “What if I never love you?” My question seemed to cause him pain, but he merely shrugged. “You will, in time, I know you will.” It was a welcome relief he kept to his word, never once pushing himself onto me. We shared a bed and I was much comforted by the warmth of his body next to me. I was content in my time with him. I liked him well enough, but even after being in his country and building a home together, my love for him wasn't there. I simply didn't feel it. He was a good man, an honest man, and a smart one too. After a year of marriage, and being in this foreign land, I tried to force myself to love him. I even thought of letting him have me despite my lack of love, but I dared not. Something inside me wouldn't allow it. I just didn't know what that something was. Now he'd been taken from me, murdered in front of my eyes. These wild men gave not a second.
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