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"I really feel sorry for American liberals, but the Canadian economy just can't support them," an Ottawa resident said. "How many art-history majors does one country need?"These are from a reader ... enjoy:A shoe repair shop: We will heel you We will save your sole We will even dye for you.A sign over a Gynecologists' office: "Dr. Jones, at your cervix.";In a Podiatrist's office: "Time wounds all heels.";On a Septic Tank Truck: Yesterday's Meals on Wheels;At an Optometrist's office: "If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place.";On a Plumber's truck: "We repair what your husband fixed.";On another Plumber's truck: "Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber.";At a Tyre Shop in Milwaukee: "Invite us to your next blowout.";On an Electrician's truck: "Let us remove your shorts.";In a Non-smoking Area: "If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and will take appropriate action.";On a Maternity Room door: "Push. Push. Push.";At a Car Dealership: "The. I told her I didn’t want to interfere with her plans and besides we would be going to the ball game the following week. On Saturday I felt down. It had been months since I even got laid. I was all wrapped up in Ariel. I went to a bar where I knew older women hung out. They were always looking for young guys. I had a drink and a woman sat next to me and said I looked like I needed company. She put her hand on my thigh and I knew what she wanted. We left and went to her place. It was a mobile home just outside the city limits. I don’t even remember her name, all I knew is she wanted to get fucked and that’s what we did. I used condoms and fucked her twice. She was pretty drunk so after we were done I covered her up and went home. Why didn’t I enjoy it that much? I came both times and she wasn’t all that bad looking. I knew what my problem was. I felt I cheated on Ariel and it was working on my conscience. I wasn’t even in a relationship and yet was bothered by it. I went to bed and.
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