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. and that Steve wouldn't ever get into "that" kind of mood again. While taking Brian home, he asked me if I would ask Steve for him, if he could stay with us for a few days. Seems that his landlord wanted him out and he didn't have anywhere else to go at the time.A friend of ours ended up picking him up the next day, with all of his stuff, and temporarily moved him into our basement. Now was the real test. Could I look at him day after day and not touch? Did I have that kind of willpower? Only time would tell, as I secretly hoped that Steve would again get into the "mood" that he was in the week before. After only a few days though, Brian told us that when he collected his pay that week, he would be going home to his family on the other side of the province. I would probably never see him again. All of a sudden, time was an issue. Was I going to get the chance to taste this sweet young man before he left?Wednesday morning already, and Brian was heading home tomorrow morning. He has. ? Forthe moment, my revere of her was broken and reality returned full force.? Defiancewelled up inside of me.? There are twoforms of survival in life.? There is thesurvival of your physical body, which demands a great deal.? But there is also the survival of yourconcept of the self.? Sometimes, thesurvival of the self requires that a person sacrifice their body to maintainthat identity.? But that sacrifice of thebody requires a great deal of strength.?It was not a part of my identity to beg to be raped by a woman I hadonly just met, or by any woman.? I wouldmuster the strength to sacrifice myself up for punishment to maintain thatidentity.? Perhaps she would put thatthing inside me, but it would not be at my request.?No, bitch,? I murmured with a horse throat, thinkingperhaps the bitch part was a bit over the top.She simply sighed.?Her stroking of my scrotum continued for a minute more.? I almost imagined that she was sad; perhapsshe had some emotion after all.? Perhapsthis was some.
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