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Any time he felt attracted to or wanted to have sex with a female, the guilt and fear would be right there screwing him up emotionally and sabotaging his chances for sexual fulfillment. Ariel was also screwed up by the fact that he saw all women as his mother and looked for his mother in all women. Because as a child, he had to be his mother's lover, he could never really be her son and there was a huge void in him from the lack of adequate, nurturing mothering that he sought to fill with sex, and a deep well of sadness from the loss of his parents' love and his childhood that he looked to sex to heal. Of course, sex could not do these things and Ariel was miserable. When he had a lover, he was afraid and insecure, and when he didn't have a lover, he felt abandoned and worthless. As a teenager, Ariel developed many addictions to avoid feeling the tremendous emotional pain he was in. He stopped taking care of his body and so became truly unattractive, which invited further rejection. " are you sure you want to do this? " he asked, he seemed almost surprised I still wanted to." yes, do you want to get your cock out? " it seemed strange even saying that to a guy and I surprised myself I even did!!He reached down below his belly and slid his trackies down and in the darkness I could see his soft cock flop out. He was very shy and obviously embarrassed. I too got my cock out. I couldn't believe this was happening, and reached across and caressed his dick, took a deep breath and leaned across.I will never ever forget the feeling of his cock going into my mouth!! Smelling him, the feeling like soft rubber, it felt so much bigger than I expected a cock to feel in my mouth!! And he wasn't even big or hard! As I worked him I grunted and moaned and his cock got very hard very quickly!!"i can't believe im doing this! " I said between two bobs of my head.Before long, after a few gags from me he softly grasped my head and said" in going to cum, gently now "I softened the.
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