406 batting average -- was considered damned near unapproachable.Both records had remained unthreatened for well over 60 years.I knew that nobody was ever going to call me "Joltin' Josh." But I also knew what I could do. I could hit singles. And a double, now and then, just to break the monotony. And, yes, I had entertained thoughts of DiMaggio's record, as well as Ted's. Why the hell not? Until the beaning, at least, I had been spraying base hits around like Ty Cobb on steroids. The only reason I wasn't still hitting over .400 in late May was that a funny thing had happened to me after I'd gotten my cheekbone smashed. Something -- I wasn't sure just what -- was off. Just a little off, but enough that my hitting had become unreliable.I really thought that Sandy had brought me out of it with her Magic Box, but now -- I wasn't so sure."You still there?" She startled me. It was Sandy, still on the line, waiting for the answer to her question about who did I think I was. I guess my mind. " "I'll handle the next one," said Propontia. "What do youwant now?" "All right," said the old man, "my second wish: within twoweeks, you'll hand over every one of your mermaid followers to the villagersfor punishment." "What?!" they all shrieked. "Fuck you! Not a chance!" shoutedthe imperious Tritonia. He simply smiled and said: "Didn't we all just swear a terrible oath?What'll happen to you if you don't hold up your end?" "He's right Sis," said Propontia. "We can find new girls,though I have to say these were the best." (Tritonia just scowled andground her teeth.) "Here," said Propontia, "let me get it overwith." She took a breath, then emitted a pain-filled wail. "Oh my," shegasped, "it's like laying a thirty-pound egg! You've got your wish, youbastard." "Thank you." "My turn now," said Kiki. Tritonia broke in: "If you wanta treasure or lovely ladies, here's your last chance." "Indeed," said the old man. "I want the prettiest treasure,the loveliest ladies I've ever seen. A.
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