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..never tasted another guy's cum in akiss before... never moved on one like that before. You kinda mademe forget I was and what you are, and it's scary as hell." He shookhis head. "No. Much as I'd like you, I can't Laurie. I can't starthitting on guys...even if they're nice and pretty as you."Suddenly feeling insanely desperate I hopped to my toes and triedto press lips but was only able to brush his before he pulled back."Chuck, I know I'm not a real girl but I'll be one as close as Ican, please--!" No, Laurie--" his voice hardened "--Lawrence! Get over it, okay??"he warned with a poker face as though struggling with a lie. Hishand pushed past my elbow to open my door behind me. "Lock the doorand forget tonight. While you're still a guy."A flurry of tugging sexual allegiances rushed my mind; Listen to him,asshole! He's trying to keep yours open!Suddenly I felt like one in my svelte pink ski suit; very soft,small and yielding, as though I was transforming within itspolyester cocoon. I. That's funny isn't it, an experienced photographer gets better and better, but an experienced model is just old.Eric had been making some noise for the last couple of years about us settling down and making some babies, but I had told him that I couldn't do that to my body while I was still young. I can't believe that I had turned down the chance for a more permanent life with the man I loved, for just my own vanity, but that's what I did; that and more. Anyway for a long time Eric was the only photographer I'd work with. He still shot other models, but did his best work with me.Eric did 50 or 60 shoots in 2004, I did 3. The writing was on the wall for everyone but me.Eric started making plans for us to retire and raise a family together. I told my agent to start accepting gigs from other photographers, because I thought that Eric was holding me back. Why I thought that, I still don't know today; Eric was actually holding me up not back, but my ego couldn't deal with it.On one of.
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