We have an understanding now and we’re going to use each other, it’s not poetic but it is beautiful. Your first sample of me, your first touch, well I’m easily excitable at the best of times but I’ve been building this up in my head for a while now, and I gasp instantly at the realisation of your fingertips on my face. Simple isn’t it, well it is, you’re checking me out, this time with touch instead of your eyes although they are here too and they watch the changes in my face, as it shows you what you suspected, that I’m needy, sexually I mean, very much in need of everything you have to offer me. Your fingers they find my mouth and I suck one then two then three into me, you feel them touch the back of my throat all the while my eyes don’t leave yours. I’m checking you out now, I want to read you correctly I want to drive you crazy. My pussy is already starting to drizzle and the aching well it’s begun deep inside me in a place that I can’t reach. If squeeze my legs together my. I guess I thought you would carry on, meet someone else and forget all about me. But not so simple, eh? In one selfish way (see, still got that trait) I suppose that pleases me (my ego, anyway). But, in reality and truthfully, I’m distressed at the damage to your life and happiness that I caused 32 years ago. Believe me, Petal, if I could turn back the clock and start again, I would. Whether we would have been together for life, no one knows – but at least we would have found out and not lived our lives always wondering ‘what if?’ Hope that makes sense. One other thing I must say is this: I am grateful and amazed that you can still think kindly about me, despite everything I did to you. I know I can never make up for it all but I do want you to know that I’ve never stopped loving you. No consolation, I know, but at least I’ve told you. Oh dear, I’ve just read through what I’ve written so far and it’s really a down-in-the-mouth message isn’t it? It even rivals those suicidal Country.
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