The moment I started being Cristina on a more permanent basis somethingdrastically changed on me. A different sort of energy took over, the sortI never felt in the past when I was still Chris. Different sentimentsalso took over my mind and the need to become a female servant andcleaner had become a near obsession to me. I really and truly can'texplain it but the fact is that I feel very comfortable in my currentposition and for as long as you fully accept and endorse Crissie I feelI'm here to stay." I said in a cracked voice full of emotion.Pat looked at me with her clever eyes full of apprehension and said, "Ithought that much Crissie dearest and although I'm an academic whodoesn't believe in the supernatural, in your case I simply give up andaccept what I see. All I can say is that the change of your persona iscoming from deep inside and you somehow have miraculously managed to wakeup some dormant and hidden elements on you. So, let us both be happy andaccept what we really are." Si. Normally I would have listened to Chris but tonight was about flirtingwith Phil and was about vodka. I poured myself another. I had neverdrunk vodka before and it was quite a discovery. I had always thoughtof beer as a men's drink and thought of spirits like vodka as women'sdrinks. But vodka had quite a kick to it and I noticed some of the menwere drinking it to. I realised then that I was now seeing "the men" as"other" and identifying myself as not a man, as a woman whereas I wouldpreviously seen the men as individuals not a collective and myself asone of them. I would have seen "the women" as "other".We kissed a number of times and I remember Phil calling me the mostbeautiful woman he had ever met in the vodka fuelled haze of thatevening.I recall also Leanne getting angry with me too and telling me I wasdrunk and she was going home now.The next thing I remember is waking up in a strange bed with my headspinning. I pulled the sheets off me and saw I was wearing myunderwear,.
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